7 Things Parents Need to Know about the Period of PURPLE Crying
The first time I experienced a Period of PURPLE Crying phase with a newborn, her mother and I traded off shifts holding a screaming baby . . . and sometimes (okay, pretty often), crying right along with her. It felt endless, it felt hopeless, and it hurt us deeply that we couldn’t soothe her enough to make her stop crying. This period lasted 6 weeks—from around 6 weeks old to 3 months old—and then it stopped as abruptly as it began! It wasn’t until I learned about the Period of PURPLE Crying that I understood what we had experienced, and this has become a topic I love to educate and empower parents about!
Most new parents are told about the Period of PURPLE Crying while at the hospital after delivering . . . along with tons of other information and reams of pamphlets intended to help launch their parenting journey on the right foot. But by the time the Period of PURPLE Crying kicks in for their baby, they feel completely blind-sided and unprepared. Knowing what to expect—and what to do when their baby does enter the PURPLE crying phase—can help alleviate stress, frustration, and concern for parents, and can help babies feel loved, supported, and safe.
Here are the top things parents and caregivers need to know about the Period of Purple Crying:
1. What is the Period of PURPLE Crying?:
The Period of PURPLE Crying is the phrase used to describe the time in a baby’s life where they cry the most, sometimes for hours per day, with no clear reason for the tears—they are fed, they are clean, they are well-slept, they’re being held and loved, and still, they cry! For new parents especially, this phase seems to hit unexpectedly and can cause extreme confusion, frustration, concern, and fatigue—“What is wrong with my baby? Why won’t they stop crying? What can I do? I feel like something must be seriously wrong! THIS CANNOT BE NORMAL!”
The Period of PURPLE Crying has been researched and defined by the National Center for Shaken Baby Syndrome (NCSBS). They have identified the Period of PURPLE Crying as a NORMAL stage of infant development that generally starts around 2 weeks of age and can last up until 3-5 months of age. This stage involves a significant daily increase in a baby’s inconsolable crying where nothing seems to have caused it and nothing seems to help consistently. It can be difficult for everyone—baby, parents, and caregivers alike—but with knowledge and preparation, we can make sure everyone survives this period safely.
2. Why it is important to know about the Period of PURPLE Crying?
The NCSBS wants EVERYONE to know about the Period of PURPLE Crying to prevent babies from being shaken by their parents or caregivers during this period. The #1 trigger for shaken baby syndrome is an adult’s frustration with a baby’s crying, and tragically, approximately 25% of victims of shaken baby syndrome die because of their injuries. 80% of the babies who don’t die suffer lifelong disabilities. Additionally, the NCSBS reports that shaken baby syndrome is the leading cause of child abuse deaths in the USA. The NCSBS believes that by educating parents and caregivers on what to expect and what to do when this phase hits, all babies can be kept safe from harm!
3. The PURPLE Acronym can help parents and caregivers be prepared:
There are several aspects of the Period of PURPLE Crying that are consistent for each experience. Being prepared can give parents and caregivers confidence that what their baby is going through is normal, and while frustrating and concerning at times, it is a stage of normal infant development that WILL pass.
The acronym PURPLE can help parents identify if their infant is experiencing this stage in their development:
P—Peak of Crying: Your baby may cry more each week, the most in month 2, less in months 3-5
U—Unexpected: Crying can come and go and you don’t know why
R—Resists Soothing: Your baby may not stop crying no matter what you try
P—Pain-Like Face: A crying baby may look like they are in pain, even when they are not
L—Long-Lasting: Crying can last as much 5 hours a day, or more, and still be considered normal
E—Evening: Your baby may cry more in the late afternoon and evening
4. The Period of PURPLE Crying is normal and a universal experience for all babies:
One of the most important messages of the Period of PURPLE Crying educational movement is making sure all parents and caregivers know that this stage of development is completely normal, and that if the baby is growing, not sick, no fever, and not showing any other problematic symptoms, they are very likely going through the Period of PURPLE Crying and do not need medical intervention.
This sudden increase in inconsolable crying can start around 2 weeks and can last up to 3-5 months. Research shows that crying increases the most during the 2nd month of life and then tapers by months 4-5. Research shows that babies can cry for five or more hours EVERY DAY . . . and still be considered healthy and normal.
That said, any time a parent or caregiver is worried that there is a medical issue for a baby’s increase in crying, it is important to have their doctor evaluate the baby to be sure they are all right. If all is medically fine, it’s safe to assume their baby is dealing with PURPLE crying.
5. The Period of PURPLE Crying is temporary!!:
Another important message of the Period of PURPLE Crying is reassuring all parents and caregivers that this phase of development is temporary!! Your baby won’t cry all day/every day/forever, I promise you that!
As you weather this phase with your baby, you may find there are certain times of day where the PURPLE crying gets worse—for most infants, it’s the afternoon and evening—or you may find there are certain ways of soothing that seem to work consistently most of the time, so you can get into a rhythm of anticipating the inconsolable crying and having a plan of action for when it hits.
It will also be helpful to keep reminding yourself that not only is this just a temporary phase of development, but EACH bout of crying is temporary. The PURPLE crying DOES end.
6. Tips for Soothing and Survival:
While sometimes PURPLE crying involves a completely inconsolable baby, there are ways to approach soothing that can make a difference for both the baby and their parent or caregiver. Having many soothing tools in your toolbelt will help, as you may find that a technique that works one day fails miserably the next, or that certain techniques only work at specific times of the day, or with specific caregivers. Keep trying all you can to bring calm and quiet to both your baby and yourself, and know when it’s time to walk away and give yourself a break.
The biggest recommendation from the Period of PURPLE Crying program is to increase the “comfort, carry, walk, and talk” response with your baby. This response involves many of the often-recommended approaches to soothing a crying baby; carrying your baby increases closeness, eye-contact, and human stimulation, comforting and talking to them gives them a reassuring sensory experience combining your scent, sound, and touch, and walking gives a steady physical rhythm that is similar to rocking.
You may find it’s helpful to change baby’s position as you walk—sometimes propped over your shoulder, sometimes tucked towards you, sometimes tucked facing away from you, I’ve even had one baby that preferred being in a “football” hold, draped on their stomach over my forearm with their head facing away from me in my elbow and feet dangling. Keep trying new positions to find the one your baby feels most comfortable in at the time. Their preferred position, too, can change from day to day! You may also want to try baby-wearing or wrapping baby in their swaddle when walking.
7. Sometimes it’s safest for everyone if YOU take a break!:
There may be times when all attempts to soothe fail, and you find yourself reaching a dangerous level of frustration and fatigue. THE BEST THING YOU CAN DO IS PUT YOUR BABY IN A SAFE PLACE AND WALK AWAY FOR A 5-10 MINUTE BREAK.
Here’s the real talk—that baby is going to cry in your arms or it’s going to cry in their crib, and sometimes, it’s safer for them to cry in their crib for a few minutes while you do what you need to do to recenter yourself. Hand them to another adult if you can, but having them cry in their crib while you go drink some water, make a phone call to a supportive person, or take some deep breathes (or do some screaming of your own) in another room, is a perfectly safe place for them to be while they cry and you recenter.
It is of critical importance that you take care of yourself during these critical times, and throughout this period, because the calmer and more settled you are, the better equipped you will be to take care of your baby. Just keep telling yourself—"My baby is fine, I’m doing a great job, and the crying WILL come to an end.”
While we now know that the Period of PURPLE Crying is normal and temporary, it can still be an incredibly difficult time for the parents. Having a Newborn Care Specialist as part of your early support team can help you weather this time in significant ways, as they can teach you new ideas for soothing, take over when you get overwhelmed, and give you respite (and a full night of sleep!) when they work an overnight! The bonus is having another adult who knows and loves your child AND has experienced PURPLE Crying before. Working as a team, you’ll all survive—and thrive!—through each difficult newborn stage of development.Learn more about the Period of PURPLE Crying at: http://www.purplecrying.info/
Need more tips for soothing your baby? Find more help here: http://www.purplecrying.info/sub-pages/soothing/common-sense-and-well-tried-soothing-methods.php
Desperate for a break? Reach out to Jaynie for help!
Click Get Started or email easybeginningsnewborncare@gmail.com!
